Playing with Glamazons Friday Confessional... go ever and play with her... she needs some love this week as she has gone under the knife to get her innards disconnected. (dont ask)
10. Religious Protesters. Seriously people, if you disagree with my beliefs then so be it... chances are I disagree with yours too but I will never take time out of my busy family life to picket your place of worship. As I watch you yelling and screaming all red faced and manic, I can only imagine the examples you are to you children as they watch you berate someone for the way they choose to worship.
9. Peas. Argh, the thought of them makes my stomach turn. I think I must have regurgitated them way too many times as a child and when I even get a whiff of them I imagine the green stains on my couch.
8. Skinny People who give unsolicited advice on what I should do to be as "healthy" as they are. I know what makes my ass fat. I know how to make it smaller. I've tried your tactics and I didn't like it. So kiss my fatass.
and to continue along that same theme.....
7. Fat people who blame everything but the Ho Ho's they are eating for the reason they are overweight. You aren't fooling anyone. It isn't glandular... it's psychological and it's about self control and what you eat and the fact that you don't exercise.
6. Parents who think their kids are perfect. The funny thing is... these children of these delusional people are usually the ones that are terribly misbehaved and are destined for a life behind bars.
5. Men who constantly grab themselves. What is with this all about? Can't you work this problem out in private? I know this guy who does more ball handling than Kobe Bryant. I know you may get a pinch or an itch occasionally.. women do to but you don't see us fondling ourselves at the grocery store do you?
4. Anyone who acts differently around others to make believe they are a certain type of person than they truly are. If you like Nascar, then like it. If you can belch on command, brag about it. Don't pretend that you are someone else because you think it is more socially acceptable. Grow a "set" and be who you are and love it. On the other hand, if you are a total social idiot who has no class or tact... don't necessarily flaunt it for the world to see either. Take a class or read a book or something and learn some social skills.
3. Hair that grows out of people's noses. Please manicure your nasty orifices... I know as we age, we get hair in our ears and noses... 1 minute a day can alleviate the need for me to be forced to stare at your 4 inch nose hairs.
2. One uppers. I have mentioned this on my blog before. When I am having a conversation with you... listen. Don't just sit there pretending to pay attention while you think of a better story to trump mine with. It's rude and you look like a dumbass.
1. Liars. I don't need to say much more than that. Out of all these things listed above this is definitely the thing I truly do hate the most.
That was a bit therapeutic I must say....
talk to me about Macaroni Kid at hidingfromthekids@live.com
34 crazy comments. I'm still waiting for yours!:
LOL I love your list! I completely agree!! You rock :)
excuse me while I go belch on command! Bahaha Just kidding *(maybe)
I love your list and can completely relate to every one of them (and it doesn't surprise me).
Nice to know I'm not the only one who can't stand one uppers. This week I had to deal with religion bashing one uppers, ugh!
hahaha, you are hilarious. And I don't know which one I hate more-the skinny biotches or the whiny fatties. That's why I'm just a silent fatty...if I want to lose weight, I will. Otherwise, mind your own business. One uppers-so stinking annoying. Although me and my siblings do that like its a sport.
And religious bashing-again, why can't people mind their own darned business?
Thanks for playing! Mwah! (I just saw you cyber-cringe-c'mon, you love it :)
Wow...it is difficult to comment on your list because my eyeballs are forever scared by the picture of the nosehair braids!! lol
It has been a while since I have been over. Thanks for the laugh though. I ate peas for dinner tonight. I hate peas and I hate baked potatoes but that is what Peter made for dinner and I was so stinking hungry that I ate them both and loved them. I am discovering everything is better with a tablespoon of salt. (BTW I wasn't one uping your story I was just wasting your time)
Your list is awesome. I love it and agree with all of it.
Love the list.. the nasal passage hairs umm not so much that my dear chiefy was just nasty lol..
ROFL!
Your list is priceless!
I abhor peas! I can not and WILL not eat peas!
Warning: I'm about to one-up you....
Re #5--In Zambia you will frequently see men not just readjusting or scratching but full on holding it as they walk down the street. It drives me crazy!!
Great list!
I totally agree with your whole list! I love the images that go along with it though, they're priceless! Haha!!!
Bhahaah! I love your blog, it's so true. Many of the things you hate, i hate too!
And ughh liars! They are the worst...
Great blog :)
Check out mine at www.thoseblissmoments.blogspot.com
K xx
Great list! I'm with you on every one, except the peas. I actually like those.
I bet that was therapeutic. I would agree with all of these!
Can I please copy your list? Especially the skinny/fat one. I don't blame my overweightness of glands. I'm perfectly aware it's the Reese's fault:)
Wonderful list! But you have to learn the secret to peas. If you mix them in your mashed potatoes they disappear!
GREAT post!!! You hit the nail right on the head! lol
I left you an award on my blog so if you get a second swing by & check it out!
~Angela
Why do I always get all paranoid and think you are talking about me when you do this kind of thing......?
Ok I love EVERYTHING on your list - especially #7 & #8! HAHA!
Great list.
I am ready to put a beat down on a few certain Baptist's.
Okay the pictures accompanying this post... nasty! Yeah going to have to try and burn those images from my eyes :)
Great great list though; I posted some pictures of my kids once on facebook, and my sister-in-law said; "those are cute pictures; I think you are almost getting to a better photographer than me; but it is probably because you have a nicer camera." One of those moments that she should have just stopped after the first few words.
Are you in Topeka, KS? I swear your picture on there for the religious bashers look just like a family that live there that do that exact thing. Ugh.
I agree with everything you said, except the peas. Gotta admit, I love them! :)
Love this list....and yes, Liars SUCK!!!
I don't think I have EVER read anything on any blog I've agreed with more. Haha. I seriously could have written this. You = awesome.
I don't know how I was following your Tweets and yet not your blog, but I just fixed that. ;)
OMG!! I think that is the most hilarious post I ever read!! Totally LMAO!!! I was trying to read it to my hubby and was laughing so hard, I couldn't get the words out! And I have TEARS running down my face! That was a classic....you made my day. LOL
Tree (aka Mother of Pearl)
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That picture of the braids coming out of the nose is so disgusting and hilarious all at once. I bought Jdaddy a "hair trimmer" one year and put it in his stocking. I don't want him to ever be like that. LOL
If I "grow a pair" can I fondle myself in public?
And who you calling ho?
I mean...I do NOT eat ho-ho's...fluffiness runs in my family, by God...I mean by Budda...I mean by Allah.
Sorry...I change my religion every 10 seconds based on what Fox News is reporting.
I'm gonna go trim my nose hairs and vajazzle myself now. (That was a total lie.)
LMAO. Just so you know. That was really me up there at the 10:07am comment.
Somehow I was signed in under my mans email!!!!!
I hate many of these things too. Liars especially. Oh and my fat a$$.
Love your list! I hate peas and nut adjusters too! LOL!
I've been out of the loop for a bit, but I read this and I have to tell you, (though this may frighten you), that we are twins in every respect. Well, as far as this list goes. Even #9-when I was a child I would literally throw up at the kitchen table when I was forced to eat peas. Needless to say I was not forced to very many times.
Hey chief!! I left you a comment the other day about how much you made me laugh (posted under Mommies Faves...my other id LOL).
But, I wanted you to know that I have featured your post on my blog today for my "Sunday Linky Love!"
Come check it out! :)
http://www.motherofpearlitis.com/2010/04/sunday-linky-love.html
And about the guys all of the sudden grabbing themselves... I have a theory.
I think they are trying to make sure "it" is still there. They seem to do it out of the blue as if it's automatic and to keep themselves appraised of the... situation.
That is the only thing I can think of.
WHAT ABOUT RANDOM CHIN HAIRS? can you hang with that? if not.. remind yourself to take off your glasses when we meet up
x
xoox
peas... boogy loves peas
I love this post! What about the cell phone VM that leaves clear instructions on how to leave a VM?? Seriously...if you don't know by now...really!
Anyway, I have been doing your what I meant to say wednesday's for a couple weeks and i really like it. Good Idea!
I am a new follower and I dig reading your blog.
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